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Howls at a blood moon
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in jon_a_ross' LiveJournal:

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Friday, December 21st, 2018
3:14 pm
Monster by degrees
Monster by degrees

I was talking to a friend when they said that I was sounding like a monster abusing the dog like that. And it hit me. Not because they were right, after all, I’m not a monster. But because they thought I was sounding like one. So something had gone wrong, was it how I was telling the story?

And that started me down a path I don’t much like where it took me but I think I have to share to see if I missed a branch or something.

You see, the story I was telling was of how I got my amazon package. The poor guy was hours overdue and having a rough day. I open the door at my parent’s place and their large, stupid and protective dog tried to drive off this dangerous threat on the doorstep. The dog was trying to get between me and the few inches of open door and I (humourously I thought as I told the story) grabbed the dog by the throat in one hand and tried to sign the amazon guy’s phone on it’s broken screen with my off hand.

In my head (and worrying even now) the scene to me is funny. A large guy holding back a large dog while trying to not break worse something damaged and being polite about it the whole time. I get the package with my off hand and juggle closing the doors while still controlling the dog, bringing it to the couch where I sat on it for a few minutes before opening up the package.

Nothing in there sounded abusive to me. But I was also the one A) In Control and B) telling the story.

And the concern that was raised is that perhaps I’m too close to this issue. That I can’t see what is clearly abuse because I’m the one doing it.

My concern now is that they aren’t wrong. I can’t say I’m in the right. It’s somewhere in the middle and that isn’t really a good place for an issue of abuse to sit. It may not even be in the middle at all but I want it to be, Again because I’m the one doing it.

So let’s all go along on the ride as I think about this in public. I’m sure some good will come of it. Or something.

This dog is oldish (9 years old gordon setter) and not the brightest. Some setters are able to understand their owners wants and appear to follow their instructions while still getting what they want. Say if they aren’t to chase horses they will start the horses running and then stop when they see the door to the farm house open so it looks like the Other Dogs were the ones chasing horses. Not this dog.

This is a dog who believes that anyone will take his food away. The cats, the other dog, the very person who just finished giving the food to the dog by putting it in the food dish. Anyone! So everyone who approaches has to be driven off. Snarl Snarl Snap Snap.

When I started spending time around this dog it tried to drive me off as an invader. On a couple of occasions it was so determined to drive me off I had to protect myself by wrapping it’s muzzle in a towel and bringing it to the ground. I didn’t hit the dog, I didn’t unload verbally on the dog, I made sure my hands were safe should the dog try to shift and it wouldn’t be able to bite me and we waited five to ten minutes after it’s last growl/snarl at me and I let it go.

The window of how long it had to go without making noise grew each time it snapped, snarled or growled at me. It served both as a way of making sure the dog understood that I was bigger than it and in control. And to calm me down, counting slowly up to 300 or 600 or somewhere in the middle.

Thankfully it took only a long damn time, six weeks or more, before the dog stopped trying to drive me off every day. Before then I had also switched tactics a bit.

The online resources I read and said that once the dog understood I was part of the pack and above it in the pecking order I should be fine. I don’t know on which part it failed to sink in, that I was indeed part of the pack here or that I was above it. But it was suggested that food rewards would work.

So I tried that for a long time. Carrying treats in my pockets and rewarding the dog whenever it saw me and didn’t snarl, growl or bark. I even forgave the barking if it barked before it saw who it was.

I honestly saw no change during this treat stage. I did start it before the dog had stopped snarling at me and trying to intimidate me way with snapping it’s teeth at me. So while it did stop that I can’t say it was because it learned I was a source of treats.

The dog once tried to bite my fingers as I gave it a second treat, out of fear that I was going to take the first away. The very treat that I had just given it and bringing my hand in too close (ie within a meter) was a problem so the dog rushed me and snapped. I didn’t take that well, to be honest. If the dog things he can charge me, teeth out and reaching, I was quite upset.

How I handled it was by slowing down how many treats I was prepared to reward. This was a good month or more after I had started and carrying around dog treats in my pockets wasn’t something I wanted to keep going anyway. The dog never really seemed to connect my person to the treats.

There is a possible reason for that, too. As the dog honestly doesn’t seem to be able to tell me apart from my father at times. Most of the time. It knows my voice and used to react to just hearing it to being a little focused now. When I first spoke the dog would leap up and run to the first John shape object it saw and attempt to drive it off. That didn’t work with me (and in the more aggressive first days ended with the dog on the ground being held in place by the collar/neck) and wasn’t welcomed by the other John either.

My father turned it into a game, shouting ‘Not Me! Don’t attack me!’ Which confused the dog so that it would stop and check which John it had ran up to. It would then turn to face the other and prepare to attack.

It would do this even if the John shape was whoever was in the computer chair as it slept under the computer desk. Out of the four times that the dog has drawn blood from John’s in the house, once was when it attacked the John shape in the computer chair. And it really doesn’t understand why it isn’t always allowed to crawl under the computer desk to sleep. It acts quite hurt emotionally when I don’t let it, and it takes a few attempts being rebuffed before it stops to figure out which John is in the chair in the first place.

And because the dog has drawn blood on four occasions (at least, I don’t always check with the other John) I do worry that this stupid thing is a threat to my kids and to strangers. I know that had it attacked strangers the city’s rules would require it to be put down. Heck, sometimes it pushes towards that line being on a leash and has to be hauled back.

But for all the dog is a danger I don’t want to advocate for its destruction. It bites because it is afraid and feels the need to drive off threats. It’s too stupid to understand what is and what isn’t a threat, but it wants to act from a good place. (I think)

But the dog has also kept my mother pinned in her room for hours on days when it’s honestly locked in a crate and she didn’t know that so was afraid to go out into the hall in case the dog chased her. That someone who has to live with this dog, who has lived with this dog for years, is so afraid of it they couldn’t go get themselves lunch for fear of being attacked… that isn’t good either.

For me, not being the dog’s owner, I can’t see what good qualities the dog has. But I am also a cat owner who can only say that the cat’s good qualities is that it likes me as a heat source at night and a food source during the day. It isn’t right that I ask more from the dog than I demand from my cat. Or the other way around.

The dog and I have reached a sort of truce. I keep my hands at my sides or in my pockets when I am out in the kitchen or living room. No signs of being threatening to it, it doesn’t need to react to me. It knows that if it snarls or snaps at me I’ll make it sit with me on the couch or in the middle of the floor (depending on where it is when I catch up to it for doing so) and therefore it doesn’t react that way right away. I don’t tease it and I don’t provoke it, but I don’t tolerate it misbehaving either.

But is all of this just a long winded way of defending abusive behaviour to the dog? I can’t tell and I can’t feel confident enough to shout ‘NO!’ And if I can’t be sure that it isn’t a thing, doesn’t that make it maybe the thing? Even a little bit?

And that brings us to the title of my thoughts here. Am I a monster by degrees? If I was shouting constantly at the dog, or hitting with a stick, kicking it or anything like that I would know for sure it was abuse and I wouldn’t be willing to do it. That is wrong. But is grabbing the dog by the neck, the fleshly bit of loose skin there and pitching it tight so that I can stop the dog from turning it’s head to bite my hand, not at least a little bit down that road?

I wouldn’t ever do something like that to my kids. I don’t raise my hand to them and rarely even raise my voice. I wouldn’t want anyone to do anything like that to my kids. But my kids are not a stupid dog that needs to be controlled…….. And that defensive tone right there worries me as to how I’m not in the right.

Does that make sense? I’m mostly worried that I’m not right because I want to defend myself in some of the worst ways? That it Has To Be this way seems to be the wrong reason for something to be a way. I’ve joked about getting a shock collar and haven’t because, again, that’s a line too far for me. I’m not willing to zap the dog every time it doesn’t do what I want it to. I’m not willing to wire it up to be zapped in an attempt to get it to behave as that doesn’t teach the dog anything beyond that this collar zaps me. And it would perhaps teach a smarter dog that my owner zaps me, but I don’t think that’s a step this one would get.

The world is rarely black and white, but on some issues it has to be held to that. Or at least that’s how I feel. Consent, Abuse, Assault are all things that can’t be allowed to be ‘ok’ as long as they are light grey enough. But yeah….

Am I a monster by a few degrees because I feel that I have to control the dog through physical power. That I get grab hold of the dog by its fleshy part of the neck and gather it up in my hand so that I could direct the dog’s muzzle away from me or anyone. That I then pulled the dog along (by that same handful of flesh) to the couch where I sat until I had counted up to 300 before I let it go and opened a package for me.
I don’t feel great about how unsure I am. I don’t want to be a monster. I don’t want to think that I abuse the dog.

cruel and violent treatment of a person or animal.
"a black eye and other signs of physical abuse"

treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly.
"riders who abuse their horses should be prosecuted"

I want to be better able to defend myself, or rather to feel that I don’t need to defend myself because I’m right. I’m not doing wrong. But…

Wanting to doesn’t make it so.

Fuck, I want to walk through each of those definitions and parse out how, word by word, I’m not doing them. And if I need to break it down to that level, I can’t be right. That I don’t hit, strike or otherwise act with violence against the dog. That I don’t do it with cruel intent. That it isn’t an every day occurrence. Not even weekly now. BUT right there I have the word ‘Now’ and ‘not even’ and both of those are red flags for trouble if I were to include them in a fictional story.

All I can say for certain is that I never crossed over to abusing the dog as I think of it. I never once intended to abuse or even punish the dog. I had to Stop the dog from trying to bite me when I didn’t run away. But I didn’t need to make the dog run from me because I was going to murder it.

If the dog makes a threatening action towards my kids, that’s a different matter. I know that I’ll make sure it stops whatever it was doing when I interpreted it as a threat to my family. And I will not try to do it carefully or just enough to make sure I don’t get hurt. It Will Be stopped. And the fact I have thought about it also worries me. There have been times when I have the dog on the ground, pretending that I could rip out its guts if we were having a real animalistic fight and I feel it’s pulse race through my grip on it’s neck and I have to loosen it up a bit. I don’t want to have that power over things. But I am very aware that I had it for a moment and … yeah.

I’ve been around dogs for half my life, more or less. This one was raised with very little interaction from me. I think until this year I had only seen it four or five times, and only once at its home. No, that’s not true, twice at its home. Once I was over to troubleshoot the computer and the stupid dog kept waking up from sleeping under the computer desk and trying to scare me off until It was shouted at by my father into shutting up and going back to sleep.

It aggressively defends whatever vehicle it’s in to the point that even my father can’t get in. The dog has to be let out before others can go inside. It treats its crate the same way. This small space with a wall on at least five sides is Mine and No One can get me, as long as I guard the opening with EVERYTHING I HAVE. I don’t interact with it when it is in this state. There would be little to no good to come from breaking into the dogs space.

Things I don’t do don’t prove I don’t abuse the dog however. For al that I find myself holding up moments like that as ‘See See! I didn’t abuse the dog then so I can’t be an abuser!’ But that isn’t how such things should work.

I make fun of politicians and celebrities for such defences. The I didn’t do it this time so I didn’t do it then either. Or the I didn’t do this extreme example of what I’m being accused of doing so I can’t have done the crime. Breaking down each word in the accusation and trying to disprove each one at a time rather than taking the meaning as a whole.

Because I can’t disprove the statement, I have to accept that the statement is a little true. That I am a little bit of a monster because of it. The statement isn’t the whole truth, as I am not a terrible monster, but I have to take ownership of the fact I am a bit of one.

There has to be a path out of here. Out of how crappy this conclusion makes me feel. But, again, all the routes I see are just like those I make fun of public figures for using. Justifying bad actions doesn’t make the bad actions any less bad. Or does it? How to I feel about it?

There are supporters of Trump in the states and Doug Ford up in Canada that have to be having the same fight in their own heads. The person they support is acting at least a little bit like a monster, so are they a little bit of a monster for helping them? How much of a monster is too far before they have to admit that something has gone wrong.

Just because I have never physically hurt the dog, left marks or caused damage doesn’t make what I do better. I do hold the dog still against its will when it is misbehaving. I can’t reason with the dog as it can’t understand logic. I can’t go back in time and train it better. I can’t undo what it has learned and it doesn’t seem to be wiling to learn a new path forward.

And what am I to do myself.

The dog isn’t mine, so getting rid of it isn’t an option. I don’t think that it is something that would be considered either. After all if it’s been a threat to my mom for four or so years why would how it reacts to me be a reason to punt it.

I don’t want to be responsible for the dog being destroyed. Hell, even when it was trying to bite me to get me to leave its house all I wanted it to do was to stop and realize that I’m going to be staying. There was no urge or impulse to Hurt it. (Well a little voice that was easily shut up did say gutting it like a fish would make it stop.) Never did I act against it in fear or anger. Or at least not as the driving emotion. It is a big dog and it did want to get me to leave by any means for a time.

I can’t let it do as it wishes. That path will lead quickly to it harming others and all the legal and ethical woes that raises. I need to be responsible for the actions of the dog when I am the only one around it.

Locking it up when its owner isn’t around, or when he isn’t able to focus all of his attention on its behaviour, doesn’t seem to be a morally solid path to take either. In part because the dog treats anyone who comes into its field of vision while locked away as a threat come to murder it. Crates an it doesn’t seem to be a good thing at all, but it feels safe sleeping inside one as long as the door is ajar… and it attacks anyone who wakes it up or approaches while it is in there.

Shock collars, anti-bark collars and other repeated mechanical behaviour modification tools all strike me as being too much and abuse. Mostly because I don’t think the dog would learn from any of them.

I feel like shit that I can’t say I’m innocent of abusing the dog. I don’t _think_ I abuse the dog but there is enough evidence that from another person’s standpoint I would be guilty. Not a whole lot guilty. Not lock away for being a threat to society or anything. But I am not innocent. And that really sucks.

I sort of get lost in that thought. I’ve been thinking about this for a couple of hours now and it comes down to that. I can’t be guilty but I am not innocent. Therefore I have to be guilty. At least a bit.

At what point does punishment come into it? How guilty do I have to be?

The worst of it is, I still see the mental image from the viewpoint of the guy from amazon like this:

Fuck, this is number 62 and five hours ago I had dropped off number 9 and he was told I would be there within three hours. I’m running late, not going to get paid what I should for all of this.
Crap, they have a dog and it sounds like a big one.
The guy nearly got bit when he went to stop the dog from coming at me. Can he control it? Well he’s got a hand on it and he needs to sign for the package.
He noticed the screen is cracked to fun and back, so he doesn’t need to make a neat signature, should I repeat that to him just in case he didn’t hear?
Ok, this package is a bit too big for one hand but ok, juggle door, phone and package and see that he has done the same…
Alright, off to finish this damn day.

The sight of a dog, so intent on driving off the attacker that it almost nailed the hand used to hold it back being held back by one hand as I struggled to get all that a normal social interaction with a delivery person would entail I still find funny.

Perhaps I am a few more degrees of a monster.
Sunday, October 11th, 2015
11:37 pm
Two more comments posted on Pocket Tactics that I would like to share here
This thread is about the game The Walking Dead: Assault

I was one of the few that picked this up as soon as it was available and here are my thoughts on it.


It made for an amusing lunch half-hour anyway. The game play isn't perfect. You cannot tell your guys to attack a specific zombie (or at least I haven't found the way yet) so the crawlers will be shot before the fast walker coming at you if they are closer. But for a real time tactics game I am liking the interface so far.

The graphics are cell shaded to look like the comic. That results in a very nice visual effect as you have the usual pinch zoom, two finger twist to look around the map. It also uses the comic book characters, so if you only know the series from the TV show they don't quite look the same. With it being top down they are already fairly abstracted anyway so it likely isn't going to be much of an issue for most people.
So far (map 4) damage seems to stay on the characters so wounds early on can catch up with you.
The only downside is the minor one of the game begging you to tweet, like or link it to as many social media sites as possible. 'I cleared the hospital in 3 minutes, can you do better? Buy the game now' sort of tweets. I am not so I am not getting the extra stars (used for unlocking things) which may catch up to me on a game balance side. More thoughts after I play at bit more tonight and sleep on it.

Bottom line? I've spend more money on worse.

Another possible issue is that the core game has only 9 or 10 maps. They look like they are planning to release more maps based on each comic book season, with no clue as to the price of the additional content.

One other note, I see that the game center score board shows all the other players who have signed into the game. So far only 1603 people have got involved, but this is also day one.

Then a second post on the same thread

Final thoughts on this app for now:

I finished all the maps, giving it a to finished game play time of about two and a half hours. The leaderboards encourage you to go back and play maps again to get a better time, which leads to more supply/star points for unlocking characters or buying upgrades, which makes the game easier to go faster. If you are not a perfectionist however, the replay value is low. While on the later maps you do get some randomized elements, the major events stay the same each time. Enter this crossroads get ambushed by seven zombies. Walk towards that pile of supplies six zombies come out of the building.

Being real time there is some tension on moving your characters correctly. You cannot pause the game and plan out just where you want them to walk. They will also move up when they run out of ammo to engage in close combat if you are not watching for it, sometimes getting them into deep trouble.

For game balance they have done a nice job of mixing strengths and weaknesses on the first 9 characters. Weapon speed, strength, range and sound are all factors that are weighted against character speed, ammo and special power. The medic, which can heal all your characters, comes with a short range, weak but loud weapon. So if she gets into a prolonged fight there is a good chance that all that noise will summon more zombies getting you into an even bigger mess. The sniper is slow, making him a poor choice on most speed runs. Other characters have no ranged weapon at all, because their special power is worth it. (In theory, I haven't tried all the mixes yet)

Each character additionally has some effect on the group as a whole. Some make them move faster, have increased range or get a faster rate of fire. These factors do give you a lot of space to explore mixes. Again this is for the perfectionists who want to get up on the leader boards.

The maps offer up bonus rewards if you do them with some restriction. Finish the map in 4 minutes or don't use any special powers kind of limits. These usually require some planning on how you want to complete them. One map has you either keeping all the hunters alive (NPC's that shoot both you and the zombies) or allowing the zombies to eat the hunters to get the bonus. If your sniper gets off a shot at a hunter that could cost you both options leading to replaying the level again. If you are that sort of person.

I quite enjoyed playing the game and as I am that sort of person (#25 on the leader boards right now, with a plan to get up 10 spaces with a new team on the forest map) I know I will be playing it for the rest of the weekend at least. But there is also some questions to be asked.

New characters to be unlocked and added is a big one. As I said they did a good job balancing the first nine characters. But there are a lot of characters in the comics, balancing all of them will be quite challenging.

The unknown cost of the additional maps and no published release schedule for them makes them a big question. Frequent cheap updates would be good, but also push the cost of the app up towards. Slow, expensive updates might be a deal breaker for many players.

It isn't a bad real time tactical game, but if you are not a perfectionist the limited number of original maps will be a problem. The $1.99 price tag feels about right for the game, but they do say it is an introductory price.

For me a 4 out of 5. Not perfect, but quite playable.


It turns out I was right to be concerned about the additional maps and no release schedule. Last time I checked they never did release any of those additional maps, and that was after giving them two years.
11:32 pm
A post from Pocket Tactics that I liked enough to share.
This is my comments found in this post here.
Less than a week ago
@gosenbach called me to this thread by name. The calling was completely unrequired as this specific thread sits both on the discussions link as well as my own personal wheelhouse of interest.

Yet I was called indeed here. To learn of two games of madness and cannibalism, two games that promise to let you explore the edges of a persons limits. Is it worth the risk to reach out for that possible gem just beyond the next door or safer to turn back while you are just bloodied and not yet fallen.

Here, should I reach out and pluck these up like two orbs from the face of time or acknowledge the whispers of a weakening sanity that my promises to the cold unthinking every rolling time (present and future) hold no space for two more.

They do sparkle so. And in just the right way to promise a rush of blood and glory that also calls to me. But a distant village on that same river of time guided by the ferryman echos the cries of others. Cries of being portable and free rather than tethered to a small desk in the living room.

Oh! If only the mancave still held the throne set before the four glorious monitors and three computers that it had at its' height. There one of the three was a masterpiece of engineering. A rig fit for the catalog of distractions it held so tightly. Even the lesser of the three would still be a fine holder for these orbs.

But alas all of those three have also fallen to the claws of time and abuse at my hands. My PCs of old are but scraps recycled into who knows what. The remaining digital amusements are much lesser constructs. A castoff from my wife's place of employment services as my main data entry port. For which it does well enough but it is no machine to enter the virtual realms as freely or as deeply as I did of old.

Apple by way of their prophet Jobs have given me freedom to roam on machines that just now are approaching the points I knew of old. There is much to be said to be able to sit upon many a different throne while fighting off Thin-men, lizard men and other distractions. Indeed the fact that when I really seek a deep escape I have multiple of these devices in front of me attempting to recreate the four windows into the digital I once had speaks of their success. Or my own desperation.

Even on such journeys they are best when I lose myself completely to one window above all others. Then and now I ache for a story, a narrative or a feeling, that consumes all of my thoughts and power for a time.

These two do offer to let that happen. As with most things there is no way to reclaim success if the promise fails, nor any sign that these two have dropped their promises like so many before.

But to wait, to count out the days and weeks and months before they might yet reach the mobile sphere against the knowledge that right now I could capture these and bind them to an aging relic like myself and use them as I see fit...

Such things keep me awake and ranting on the internet at the early morning hours while I prepare the valentines gift for my wife. The same who keeps me to a budget that would be broken should I give in here and now.

But still the call goes on.
Saturday, December 22nd, 2012
8:33 pm
100 Computer Games to play before you die
Blowing the Dust off my livejournal for my first post in over a year today it seems.

Regardless, Just finished reading '100 Computer Games to Play Before you Die' by Steve Bowden

As Steve Bowden states this isn't a list of the best games, but rather a list of games he feels you need to play to understand the industry before you die or so. (He puts it better in his forward.) 

I am going to present here his list of games and mark with bold hose I have played and underline he ones I agree with. There should be no surprises really.

Animal Crossing: Wild Worl
Baldur's Gat
Batman: Arkham Asylum
Beyond Good & Evil
Burnout 3: Takedown
Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
Sid Meier's Civilization
Counter-strike: Source
Dancing Stage (AKA Dance Dance Revolution)
Demon's Souls
Deus Ex
Donkey Kong
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
Eve Online
F-Zero GX
Final Fantasy VII
Forza Motorsports 3
Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved 2
God Hand
God of War
Goldeneye 007
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
Half-life 2
Halo: Combat Evolved
Hearts of Iron II
Hitman: Blood Money
IL-2 Sturmovik: Birds of Prey
Katamari Damacy
Left 4 Dead
The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Adventures
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
Little Big Planet
Mega Man 2
Metal Gear Solid
Metroid Prime
Micro Machines
Nights into Dreams...
No More Heroes
Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath
Pac-man Vs.
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney
Picross 3D
Plants vs Zombies
Pokemon Red/Blue
Prince of Persia: Sands of Time
Puzzle Quest: Challenge of the Warlords
Resident Evil 2
Resident Evil 4

Rock Band 3
The Secret of Monkey Islands
Sensible World of Soccer
Shadow of the Colossus
Silent Hill 2
Simcity 2000
The Sims
Sonic The Hedgehog CD
Space Invaders
(Tom Clancy's) Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Super Bomberman
Super Mario Galaxy
Super Mario Kart
Super Mario World
Super Metroid
Super Monkey Ball
Super Street Fighter IV

System Shock 2
Time Crisis II

Tomb Raider Anniversary
Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3
Warioware, Inc.: Minigame Mania
Way of the Samurai
Wii Sports
The World Ends with You
World of Warcraft

So I have played 73 out of the 100. I am sorta proud of that. I don't agree with a large number on his list, but I look for different things in the games rather then a first example of X style of play or Y characteristic. Or in a few cases they made it on his list because they were the Best example of X or Y. The book is a short read if you find it, and worth a browsing anyway.
Friday, December 2nd, 2011
7:01 am
Schlock Mercenary's "The 70 Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries"
  1. Pillage, Then Burn
  2. A sergeant in motion outranks a lieutenant who doesn't know what's going on.
  3. An ordnance technician at a dead run outranks everybody.
  4. Close air-support covereth a multitude of sins.
  5. Close air-support and friendly fire should be easier to tell apart.
  6. If violence wasn't your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it.
  7. If the food is good enough the grunts will stop complaining about the incoming fire.
  8. Mockery and derision have their place. Usually it's on the far side of the airlock.
  9. Never turn your back on an enemy.
  10. Sometimes the only way out is through... through the hull.
  11. Everything is air-droppable at least once.
  12. A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head.

These Gems are slowly handed out over the comic's ten year plus run.
I was going to share a longer blog about a dream but instead this shall do as John has a cold.
Monday, September 5th, 2011
7:25 pm
From a vision that struck me just now.
From the depths of the shadow, a figure strolled forth.
A mask of pure white hung on his face without any sign of strap nor string.
Ripped and worn, stained and tainted by untold distance traveled a yellow robe was stretched across a tall skeletal frame.
The fingers of the hands were made all the longer by the unraveling bandages that dripped from each.
The faint smell of rotting roses assaults the senses.
Eyes that both seem mad and coldly calm speak to you from underneath the emotionless mask.
Perhaps a smile flickers on the lips as the light hits it. Perhaps the mask is sad.
I know not how I understand the words.
The feeling of crawling sounds, creeping towards me from under the mask, are what I hear.
The sounds are not spoken in English and perhaps not even by a throat of any human kind.
But their meaning and the promises are clear.
The King in Yellow stands before me and speaks of the end of all that is upon the galaxy.
His mate shall lose the battle.
Mankind, accident that it is upon the fabric, shall finally know his true form.
The crawling chaos shall play the horns that sound the ending of the world.
The ending of this is foretold, as the light shall blaze between the mountains of Yory’th and Say’eth and I shall stand upon the earth for all time.
The king speaks more.
Words and images and future secrets and past truths roll into me. Burrow into me.
Crawl and itch under my skin.
And I as a hold back a scream that if given voice would have ended me there and then the king speaks more.
His true name is spoken once, and my ears bleed.
His name is spoken twice and the teeth in my mouth bite the tongue to stop it repeating that which I know.
I am told that the third time it shall be spoken will be the end.
The king removes his mask and bows low to me.
An honor for not breaking my place upon the ground at his feet.
I lose consciousness for a time. The wind was now from the west… The sickly light from the fainting sun splashes like blood over the stains of my encounter.
The name echoed in my ears for the score of years from then to now.
It is now a dull roar against my brain.
I must speak it to be free.
But before I do I must do what I can to stop this.
Here, inside this journal, are my notes on how to stop what I have seen happening.
I know you will take up the challenge, for I have seen you fail.
But if you take this with you perhaps you can change what is to be.
What has already been.
A hand written note that falls out of an old book you picked up at the library. It was perhaps a disappointment to someone that you didn’t see the note and returned the book to the shelf when it wasn’t the one you wanted.
Thursday, July 7th, 2011
7:21 pm
The Wild Wild West (part 1 as my son is demanding more attention)
Watching the third season of The Wild Wild West. From 1968 this season is… The story idea is very similar to the horrible movie that came out if it years later. We have some spies running around the old west using advanced technology to solve villain of the day stories. Using pocket sized gramophone players to cause a distraction, special bullets that stick into the barrel of their pistols and so on. It is quite silly overall.

But what I notice most is that they had a limited pool of extras. So the three thugs that were hiding up a tree guarding a giant tuning fork that was being used to destroy buildings are also part of the midget evil genius circuit gang. And part of the drug smuggling ring. The lady who runs a penny arcade is also the most beautiful actress in all of the states the next week.

It really does distract me.

Michael Dunn is the actor that played the evil genius, http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0242692/ . The list of films he was in both impressive and sad for the roles he was given. Yes, in the Wild Wild West they make a number of Napoleon Bonaparte references. A joke that Jack of All Trades would use over 30 years later. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0220906/
Thursday, May 5th, 2011
5:25 pm
Written on the train
The guy who sat down across from me would not normally have registered on me. The train was full of people drained from a day of work. 
I had other objectives in my mind that interfered with my usual people watching. 
But he had a tattoo on the webbing of his left hand. 
It was a tattoo of the yellow sign. 
Not that crude three lines in a vague triangle but that of a master. 
Dozens of points that roughly described the simple shape, yet those dots were also runes. 
Layers upon layers. 
I had to look away. Trying to focus on the details of the tattoo would only make me stand out. 
I think he saw my interest anyway. 
He got off at the next stop, losing himself in the crowd. 
It didn't matter. 
I never saw his face. 
That didn't matter either. 
I had already been give the address of his family. 
Right now, they were all that mattered. 
My masters had spoken. 

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

Thursday, January 20th, 2011
7:54 am
Going to the Loom
Reviewing my steam games, pulling threads on Loom by Lucasarts.

Loom is an early point and click adventure game. Coming out between the text adventure games like Zork and the full point and click games of Monkey Island. As a puzzle game you will face a number of challenges that have only one specific answer.

Compounding the existing issues of point and click puzzle games you have the early prototype teething issues. Specifically you have only a single interaction option, click. There is no look, take or anything else. Clicking does one (or sometimes two) thing on each object that you interact with. Sometimes it treats it like a look. Sometimes a take. Sometimes a break, or learn the magic of or a sneak up and listen in on. Not knowing before you click what will happen can be annoying.

They haven't bothered to update the graphics for this release, so you have the same limited graphics that were the best they could do in the late 90s. It is hard to say if they are cute or just really dated. I’m going to go with dated because of the sour taste the ending left in my mouth.

Loom used sound as the source of magic. So almost everything used 8 bit sounds and when you heard a four note pattern you could count on it as being a source of magic. Four holes in the trees with owls that hoot different notes on a scale become the magic for a light spell. And the logic is about that fuzzy for most of the other magic as well.

But the game doesn’t tell you in game that reversing the pattern can reverse the effect. I found it annoying that when you first encounter a water spout on your path you need to know that the four notes the water spout makes can be reversed to untwist it. And that it is a twisting magic you are learning. So when you find a staircase that needs to be untwisted you do the same spell again. My mind wasn’t in the same space as the game designers.

Having finished the game I felt the ending was weak, left open clearly for a sequel that never game. The character you play seems poorly constructed. He is from a mysterious clan but knows all the other characters in the game. You don’t, so all you get is a brief bit of text. “It is the Bishop” and so on. I was completely disconnected from the world and never brought in. Made more vexing by some of the puzzles being solved by game world knowledge that you don’t have. One example that stands out in my mind is that your characters hood hides something dark and perhaps evil. So when another NPC wants to look under your hood it removes him as a threat.

I think with a walkthrough and knowing just where to go a person could finish the game inside an hour or so. It took me longer as I explored and bumbled around, but I got madder and madder at the game. I spent the first hour of playing the game just walking around without finding the first seed of the plot because I didn’t realize I could walk on a black space as a floor to get to the Mcguffin.

Calling the game done at 4.9 hours of playing, giving it a value of $9 under my system. I actually feel the game is worth much less, as the ending and content left me unhappy over all. I cannot suggest anyone else get the game unless the old classics really interest you.
7:24 am
Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days
Shooting through my steam games, this time with Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days by IO Interactive.

Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days is a 3rd person shooter set in a dark Shanghai. I played the game co-op, over two nights. Playing with a friend was the way to go, as the gameplay itself wasn’t anything special to bring be back to the game.

Actually I cannot decide if the style choices the game when with harmed it or helped it. The game chose to look like a gritty handheld documentary style game, with the issues a low quality camera would have in the places the characters go. Adding to this is a curious drive to make it a dirty realistic game and still have a pg-13 rating. All the extreme acts of violence as well as the nudity have a digital pixel distortion going on. The look was clearly meant to be what you would see for a TV documentary.

Most of the issues they faked, lens flaring, vertical lines and so on, can be turned off. And I did, because they got in the way of actually shooting people. The digital distortion couldn’t be removed officially, but you can download tools from the internet to remove it if you want. While I didn’t my co-op player did for the second night. His reports were that you didn’t see anything, as there was nothing to see. So a face that was blurred out because it took a shotgun blast at point blank range was just the characters face normally.

The game really wanted you to play it as a multiplayer over and over again experience. Which I think is why they drove to have the low pg rating. If you could get six or eight teens to play the game for a couple of hours a day and talk about it to their friends you can get a stream of income. It would also explain the downloadable content (DLC) for sale. None of it adds to the main game, but rather exists just to change up the verses multiplayer. Some of it even gives better weapons, which seems unfair. I personally didn’t try any of the verses multiplayer.

The story is quite bad, almost lazy. The characters are so stereotyped, and the world so two dimensional, that it was physically painful at points. And short, as I was able to finish it in less than five hours. I think the writing and design team just gave up, which is why you have a level in which the characters are naked trying to escape from the mob through a closed mall. Clearly they thought we have this centering software in place we might as well use it as much as possible.

Calling it finished and just over five hours of playing I’m going to give it a value of $10. About as much as a new movie, and it was about that much fun. But two player co-op was the only way to do this.
6:32 am
Sticky with World of Goo
Reviewing my steam games, this week looking at World of Goo by 2d Boy.

The first thing I want to say is that World of Goo first came to my attention by sharing their users statistics as a comment on video game piracy. Specifically they had sold one copy for every ten people submitting scores to their scoreboard. Which makes it sound bad, but there would be lots of reasons for this.

The first is that they offered the game on all three computer platforms. So if you have two different computers or even two different operating systems on one computer you would show up twice. Adding to this is that World of Goo is such a small program that transporting it on a usb key (or downloading it again) onto work computers or other systems is easy. So I think the nine out of ten people would steal a video game claim that was being made based on those stats is false.

I would also say that the numbers are no longer so warped. Thanks to 2d Boy pushing their game as hard as possible I’ve ended up owning three copies myself: One by buying the game direct from them, a second from the Indie Humble Bundle and the third was included on a Steam Indie bundle. So I’ve played World of Goo on seven or eight computers and own three copies. And the game is good enough I’m not upset about paying for it three times. (That and times I didn’t pay more then 25 dollars combined and got nine additional games.)

World of Goo itself is a puzzle game. At the start of each map they tell you the objective, usually get X number of goo balls into the pipe somewhere on the map. To keep the game interesting they keep introducing new types of goo to play with. But at first all your goo balls will do is stick together to build towers or bridges.

The game is mostly a physics puzzle engine. The goo balls stick together, but the mass of the tower being built is taken into account. You can build your tower to thin and have a strut break. Then you have an often heartbreaking scene as tower collapses, bouncing as bits of it hit the ground.

Some goo builds better, stronger bonds then others. Some goo can be removed from a tower as it is being constructed. Others are stuck once placed. Some goo is flammable, other goo is sticky. One type of goo is able to float upwards like a balloon. Other goo can form long chains.

No map has more then three types of goo on it, which helps keep the game focused. The maps are interesting and colourful. And while you do return to some puzzles, the map and the challenges have changed. These changes are in line with the storyline as well.

Each chapter consists of a score of maps. Each chapter is based on a single theme. And as you complete each chapter you see a story unfolding. You see the goo attempt to understand industrialization and even escape into a virtual computer system. The instructions for each map are written on little signs usually whimsically written by an unseen game character called ‘The Sign Painter.’

I quite enjoy the game, and steam tells me that it took six hours for me to finish it this time. I have finished it twice more, but I’ll not count those for assigning the valve of the game. With six hours and finishing the game gives it a value of $11. I don’t think I’ll keep the game installed on my computer, but I could see myself returning to it eventually.
5:39 am
Reviewing my steam games, going in deep with Aquaria.

Aquaria was a game that I picked up on the cheap as part of the Indie Humble Bundle. The idea at the time was that five independent developers of games got together and offered up five games for a single price. That price was whatever you thought those games would be worth to you. Each developer also had their game available for PC, Mac and Linux systems, so everyone could buy it.

They tracked the stats an some of them were interesting in the numbers are fun kind of way. PC users were cheaper on average then Mac or Linux, that sort of thing. But like all numbers they can be adjusted to show whatever you like. As the games were cross platform and I actually have a computer running one of each of those formats, it seemed like a great deal.

That being said, I didn't actually get around to playing the game until today. About two months ago I noticed that anyone who bought the Humble Bundle was able to get them to send unlock codes to access the games via steam. No doubt this was done to take away downloads from the indie team's own servers. Steam does so much traffic the small games that are the one included in the bundle would go unnoticed.

So what does this small indie game actually play like? That is where it starts to fall down for me.

The game has a paper cut out animated character as the lead. By which I mean you have a character who moves an arm by rotating the upper arm from the torso and the lower arm at a join at the elbow. The hand gets swapped out when it needs to change. This is the site of animation I personally connect to flash, but that is because it is the style I learned while getting into flash myself years ago. This fact is only important because the fish around her are a more flowing animation style, giving a very strong striking contrast.

The world of Aquaria is a very rich one, with other fish swimming in the waters around you. Some are hostile and some are neutral. Only there is no easy way to tell them apart until you take damage. The visual language isn't used to have all the purple, yellow or orange fish to be dangerous and the blue and green ones friendly. Instead the game has you learn through trial and error.

The game doesn't give you any reason to explore its world at first. The game implies that you are at first a simple creature not really thinking about anything. Then an event brings you to full awareness and comes wrapped in a flashforward/flashback to a homing missile firing version of yourself. Even then you are free to stroll around a world map without any goal. A point was lit up to visit, but it just gave you a handful of resources with the goal of scavanger hunting up bits and pieces.

I think the game wanted you to feel like you have the whole ocean to visit. But what I found instead was a series of dead ends that stopped in doors I knew I could open later in the game. It was not endearing me to the game.

After about 45 minutes or so I find the plot key to start an info dump of what I should be doing. But by then I was not into the game at all. I played out the rest of the hour just to see if the game would speed up, but no. I broke down and pulled up a walkthrough from the internet. It seems that most of the game is spent going back and forth from one side of the ocean to the other, collecting items. Then the final battle is the usual multi-state endboss nonsense. Four stages too. Ugh.

Floated around in the game world for just over an hour, which gives it a value of a buck under my scale. I don’t recall what I chose to pay for the Indie Humble Bundle, so I’m just going to call that good enough. I do not see myself returning to this game but I may point my son at it when he hits three or four.
Saturday, January 15th, 2011
10:05 pm
Reviewing my steam games, this time an old classic called Manhole from Cyan Worlds Inc.

This is an interesting little game, if that is the right word. What we have here is a classic 1988 program that has been recreated with full sound. This program took you into a world through the manhole, after the white rabbit. It wasn’t a game that had an evil wakened for you to kill, nor any foes at all to overcome. You just explored the world that was offered.

I didn’t know that when the game launched for the first time. So I spent half an hour just moving around looking for what barriers I was to overcome, what foes I needed to defeat. I didn’t come across anything that stopped my travels.

I don’t regret the exploring, but my brief visit left be confused. There was nothing for me to battle, so I ran to wikipedia to look up the game. That revealed that there was no goal to this game. No walk through to explain where I was to go and what I was to overcome.

The graphics are simple, about 520 by 360 pixel images done in 16 bit colours. They are fun and childish, and often very silly. You will find a sunken ship, and in the hold of that ship you will find a forest with a bear at a door that leads up to a castle. The bear says something to the effect that when the ship sunk the hold only had seeds, now it has a forest.

There is no story here either. The world is in status. So you can talk to a number of characters, but they will never change.

I’ll save this game for my son, I’m not sure what he will make of it when he is old enough to explore this world. I have put only 30 minutes but paid nothing for this game so I’m going to call that good enough. Not counting it as finished, but not going back until my son can take the helm.
Friday, January 14th, 2011
8:30 pm
Reviewing my steam games, taking to the skies with Dogfighter by Dark Water Studios Ltd.

What Dogfighter is not is a flightsim. The trailer for it posted up on steam states that as the opening line and yet myself and three of my friends who tried it all hooked up a joystick before launching the game. This game is not designed to be played using a joystick and it handles really poorly for any sort of flight sim.

Instead what Dogfighter is would happen to be a not bad arcade style shooter best controlled by your mouse. If you play it that way, thinking of the plane aspect as a style choice more then anything else, it leaves you feeling happy. Seriously, don’t think about using a joystick with this one.

The graphics are fun and a little cartoony. The planes are not pulled directly out of the real world, nor are they bizarre creations that wouldn’t fit there. What we have is a stylistic middle ground choice. I haven’t played the game extensively but none of the areas grew dull and boring.

The game does feel missing something if you play it solo. There is no solo mode and basically the same multiplayer game types are available verse bots. No reason for you to go to any of these places in fact. Unlike the Crimson Skies (xbox version) game the environments seem to have made no concessions to all the planes overhead. Crimson Skies perhaps took it too far, with almost every farmer’s field having a landing strip, but it would explain how come there were so many planes in the sky.

Like most standard shooters, you have a number of power ups to collect. Better weapons, rear firing weapons, team boosts and team penalties. That last seems a bit out of place, where you can go to pick up a radar out power up and instead it takes out your team’s radar instead. The game basically says 50/50 chance. That is something I don’t think I would have included if the game was my baby.

No so many weapons are available that they overlap, nor are they hard to find. Enough pickup points appear to exist that even with a full 16 players you will not have anyone camping out a power up spawn point.

I personally never tried the multiplayer on this game. I have six friends who already own it according to steam, so the failure there is on my part not to try to arrange something.

With just under 4 hours of play time I will give this game a value of $3. So it is an improvement on what I spent, but I cannot say that with so many other games I will keep this one around unless my friends who do have it start throwing down the gauntlet. Then I will return to teach them a lesson.
Wednesday, January 12th, 2011
9:56 pm
Zen Bound 2 up for review.
Reviewing my steam games, tied up this time with Zen Bound 2 by Secret Exit Ltd.

Zen Bound 2 is a little puzzle game. Puzzling in its very nature for the game is a little abstract. The goal is to use a length of rope to wrap up objects, covering as much of the object as possible. The game shows this your progress by painting the object as you wrap it. The designers believe the game is more relating then stressful.

When the game first was listed on steam the game design interested me. So it was with some happiness I picked it up when it went super cheap. So far it hasn’t disappointed me.

As the game is simple, the graphics look quite good. Each puzzle starts with a 3d object – usually an abstract shape- and a length of rope to tie it. The rope moves and shifts in a mostly realistic means. Sometimes you will see an odd and visible artifact as the textures on the rope sections don’t line up. But I have to say I was looking for those so it is possible the casual player will not notice.

There is no story in the game. You just have to complete all the puzzles on all the trees and finish all the puzzles. One little detail is that there are two achievements that I may never get. The first is to get three flowers (the highest rating) on all the puzzles in the game. The second is to erase your progress once you have gotten three flowers on all the trees.

Actually the game did a good job of keeping itself true to a theme. You have a list of trees to complete, each with some loose theme. People, birds, and so on. Each puzzle has three levels of completion. Each level you achieve causes a flower to bloom on the tree. This gives you a very nice impression as you scroll up the tree to wherever you left off playing.

I have put in just over my hour into the game, so it has a value of $1 to me. This is roughly what I paid for the game so it is a break even at this point. But I have to say that I will keep this one on my computer as well. I do look forward to solving all the puzzles here.
Monday, January 10th, 2011
4:43 pm
Reviewing Delve Deeper.
Reviewing my steam games, this time digging in with Delve Deeper by Lunar Giant.

Delve Deeper is a clever little turn based strategy game featuring up to four teams of dwarves digging in the name of their king for treasure. Each team is make up from Miners, Warriors or Scouts to the choice of the player controlling them. Then using the strengths of each type of dwarf you delve into a map trying to bring home more loot then the other guys.

I actually had some problems when I first got this game. It didn't want to run on my laptop, a secondary computer I have. The tech support from Lunar Giant was quite friendly, quick to respond to my request and had a patch out within a week that helped get the game running. Another week or two and a second patch resolved all the issues that I was aware of. I was also able to play the game on my main computer, so it wasn't a buggy release, just the age of the laptop in question.

My other first impression of the game was on the lack of online multiplayer. As a simple turn based game I had picked it up to test it out. If I enjoyed it I would have badgered one of my friends into getting it just for the chance to battle them online. I prefer to battle in turn based games over FPS because I can win in turn based ones. But the listed multiplayer feature is limited to a hot seat approach. Which would allow for up to four people to play against each other, if they don't mind sharing the same seat over and over.

The graphics themselves are fun. Each of the dwarf types animated for a walking, fighting and mining animation. The foes are also styled in a cute over realistic. This ties in to the writing style. Each of the official maps comes with some comments from the king before you begin. These brief little lines are often cleverly written – at least the first time you read them – and add to the game.

This is also another game where there is no story beyond what you want to make yourself. Each map feels more or less like all the others. Sure some have more grey goblins over green slime, but one monster is just like another in the middle of a battle. It will be hard to determine when I have finished this game. I am not sure which maps I have completed successfully and which I haven’t.

One last thing to find some extra value in the game is on the treasure descriptions. Most of them are based on making fun of the dungeons and dragons style treasure. As they are random collecting the whole set (which is an achievement) will be almost impossible.

I have put in over fifteen hours. I don’t regret it, but I am not sure how much more I’m going to get out of the game. I also cannot say without reservation that the game is worth collecting for full price. But the game was cheap enough during the black Friday sales.
Sunday, January 9th, 2011
9:43 pm
Tropico Reloaded Review.
Reviewing my steam titles, going out on a beach for today’s game. Tropico: Reloaded published by Kalypso Media Digital. It appears that the base game, the first expansion (Paradise Island) and the second game were all developed by different studios. As I played the first game with the first expansion included I am just going to thank the publisher.

Tropico is a sim game in which you control a whole island of people in the 1950's. The game lets you build your dictator, so you can be a farm worker installed by the KGB, or a college professor who won in a fair election. What your background is will effect how the people of the island see you as well as the cost of various buildings and other events around the island.

The game takes a humorous look at the idea of being a tin pot dictator, so you have the power to fix elections, assassinate or imprison your enemies or otherwise be a bad guy. You can also strive to win the people's respect and keep yourself in power by doing what is best for them or at least making them happy. The game only scores you at the end (but it does let you know how you are doing as you go along) so results are really all that matters.

The game, like most sims, can be seen to be fairly open-ended. After all, you are only scored after 50 years in power. But in order to add to the replayability of the game we have a number of scenarios included. From my research online it appears that most of them were added by the expansion pack, but I have over 50 different scenarios to pick from for the next time I return to the island. So I will have to decide if I want to have a simple mission (I'm a crashed KGB agent who is put in charge of the island until I can build an airport to take me home) or a harder one (I have to get the island population to below 100 people and still make 100,000 dollars so that I can turn the island into a Jurassic park experiment).

The graphics are quite nice for a ten year old game. We have enough detail to see what the people roughly look like (basically what their profession is) as well as a number of different buildings and shapes to the island. Ancient ruins, historical forts and other items of interest are quite well designed to be eye catching as you scroll over your island. And all the man made structures are quite well designed to be 50's style constructs. It does seem a little out of place for a 50's era apartment building to be constructed when the game is up to the 90's but that also fits the stereotype they are mocking.

There is no specific story to the game, outside of that set by the scenario, and most of those scenario guidelines are only a handful of sentences each. Not that you really need one, as this is a fairly nice sim.

The complexities of the game are balanced by the scale. Each citizen has opinions on food, shelter, entertainment, your leadership and so on. At least a dozen bars define them inside the game world. But you will be dealing with less then 200 of these citizens; and in most games less then 50 or 60 when you have to worry about them. So if you see a brave but low in leadership citizen you can ignore them as a threat to your power. But a high in leadership, mostly brave citizen might be the seed that starts a revolution against you.

So you could fire that individual from his job, or increase his pay and make him happy with you. The scale lets you see inside their minds (at least as far the game is concerned) and while you cannot control anyone directly you can change the environment to make them do different things.

It is important to note that the game expects you to pay attention to little details like this. A citizen will have to go home to sleep at the end of the day, and then they get up to go to work. It is possible that they will take half a day to get from their job to their home. And half a day back. So even though a job may show as fully staffed, your workers may not actually be spending any time doing their job.

I put 3.5 hours into the game so far, which got me through the tutorial and one scenario. So the game can move fast for those people who don't want their sims to be more then a single sitting. (I'm looking at you sim city) This gives the game a value of $3 under my system. I know I'll return to the game, but I think I will give the other game in the pack I got from steam a try first. So next week some time I'll try Tropico 2: Pirate Cove and see what they changed and what they didn't.
7:35 pm
Looking at Cogs for my steam game review
Reviewing my steam games, today’s game is Cogs by Lazy 8 Studios.

Cogs is a clever little puzzle game. You slide tiles around 3D objects attempting to connect pipes, link gears or otherwise bridge gaps to make the 3D object work. I am not personally a big fan of those one piece missing slide the tile around games, but I really do enjoy Cogs. Perhaps it is just because I am fond of computer games that this one reaches me.

When I first launched Cogs I didn’t know quite what to expect. I believe that I got it as part of a five pack of Indie Games. Cogs wasn’t the game I was getting the pack for but I have to say that sliding bits and pieces around to solve puzzles is a great five or ten minute time waster.

Graphically the game is simple, but far more detailed then it would need to be. Each puzzle is modeled in 3D, even if it is only a 2D problem. This lets you use the same interface and handling when you come to a 3D problem, getting steam to both sides of a cube or similar. I don’t think you could increase the graphics on this game and actually improve the game in any way. Well done to Lazy 8 Studios for finding that perfect mix of simple to complex balance for their game.

No story to speak of, just 50 puzzles to solve. Each time you solve a puzzle you are rated on how many moves it took you and how long it took for you to solve it. The better, the more gears you are rewarded. You need 300 gears to finish the game and view the credits (which may or may not be a puzzle). Each time you solve a puzzle you are awarded 3 gears and then you can earn up to 6 more. So you have to earn six gears on average for each puzzle to be able to finish the game. It means I’ll have to do some of my completed ones over again.

I’ve put in only an hour or so into the game but it was a good hour. So it has only earned a dollar under my value system, but it will be sticking around as a good way to spend those spare moments thinking.
Saturday, January 8th, 2011
9:54 pm
Reviewing Chime, from my steam games
Reviewing my steam games, this time looking at the musical game Chime, by Zoë Mode.

All chime happens to be is putting down different shapes on different game boards while music plays. And on the surface of that it is hard to see why it is a very addictive game.

So it is in the little details that this game comes alive. Each of the six levels is really just a different song. Each time the beat bar goes down the playing field left to right it triggers different sound loops based on what shapes it encounters as it goes. When you have created a block of three by three or larger rectangular section a different sound will be triggered. The section you have activated will start to fill up. While it is filling you can add to the sides of the section and spread it. You score points based on the final size of the section. The more of these sections you can create all the stray pieces are cleaned up the higher your score multiplier.

I played each level once with the sound on, but for my replays of the game I have just been leaving the sound off. As neat as it was the first time to hear the game react to how you were mixing up the pieces, it loses something after the first six minutes. And with easy mode being nine minutes on a map I honestly felt the music overstayed its welcome by the time I was done.

This last is especially true for the song 'Still Alive' by Jonathan Coulton. I am a big fan of the song, but unlike the other five it was added to the game because it was popular not because it fit the format of the game. So they broke up the lyrics and you only hear them when you complete a certain amount of the map. It is very distracting as you find yourself waiting for the next verse to start so you can sing along, or the final line repeated twenty some odd times as you attempt to finally clear the map.

To clear a map, the objective of the game, you need to fill every square with a completed section at some point. Not all at once, but just at some point. When a section has finished being filled in as stated above the beat bar will touch it and 'stamp' it down onto the playing field. This allows you to place new shapes overtop and prevents you from having to panic if you drop something in the wrong spot.

I personally cannot think of anything else to say about the game, it is really that simple. I have 7.3 hours of game play on record, plus I have finished all the maps. So a total value under my system of $12. Much higher then what I paid for it, and if you get the game cheap I can suggest that playing each level at least once is worth it.
Wednesday, January 5th, 2011
7:40 pm
Looking at my Steam games, this time Genesis Rising
Reviewing my steam games, a young boys game called Genesis Rising by Metamorf is up to be talked about.

Now, I have to say that I got this game because my friend bought it as well, and it listed Multiplayer as an option. I thought that it would be fun to do a space based game in the style of Command & Conquer 3. I never actually played it multiplayer, which if it is a saving grace I’ll never know.

This game has a very ugly interface; it makes it hard to get into. Combined with the 2d space battle fights, the really bad story and battle animations I was not able to enjoy my hour with this game.

The graphics themselves are not bad, they were looking for something unique. But I find the character designs to be so bad I was offended. The game feels like a bunch of 30-somethings trying to sell a game to 12 year olds. We have extreme blood whenever you kill a ship. Yeah, ships explode into a shower of blood. The female character has a bare mid-drift and design that makes Lora Croft from the first tomb raider look normal. Insulted because I know I could personally do better. And there is no way a paid professional designer couldn’t do better while drunk unless this was their objective.

The tutorial missions introduced me to the game concepts. You kill other ships, drink blood from their corpses to heal and steal their genes to upgrade your own weapons. Not a bad idea. But then the controls are this swirling 3d view trying to control objects in a 2d plane. So if you are not looking directly down on the plane you cannot say for sure where your ship is going to end up. (You can also ask the computer to draw the reference plane as a grid, but that isn’t as helpful as they thought.)

Thinking about it, that 3d controls on a 2d plane felt much like my 3d modeling programs. You can swirl, twirl and zoom around a fixed point in 3d space and then use the arrow keys to shift along the 2d axis. All this viewing control makes for a fine control scheme in a slow placed design environment. But when you are in a battle situation you should have the controls maximized for action which response.

So the tutorial missions left me in a bad mood, unhappy with the game. But they have this 8 minute long cut scene that was the final straw.

We start with the mission with your father giving you this ship. And then takes you to another ship that is actually your birthday present. I watched the scene twice to make sure I hadn’t misread that. It is clear your father gives you the ship you are in (as a young boy, too young to own your own space ship, as the game points out.) You then fight in a mission so lopsided that you can seriously not give your ship any orders at all and still win. As I said this was the final straw and I did it twice to make sure it happens as I will complain about.

From this fight we go to eight minutes of cut scenes. In these eight minutes we are told it is forty years later, making your character at least fifty yet looking maybe late twenties. You get info dumped hardcore as to who these people are telling you what you need to do. The Emperor of mankind is telling you to go find this McGuffin out in the same zone of space in which your father vanished years before. You get to have dialogue options of blue (choir boy) or red (jerk) with a handful of people. And then you watch these battle scenes in which armored aliens and armored humans fight with pistols and assault rifles within arms reach of each other. Seriously, they could reach out and push the gun away sort of close. And in mixed formation, humans and aliens standing (not running, but standing and shooting) around killing each other. It just struck me as a really poorly thought out scene of a dozen alien models and a dozen human models not animated at all well.

And I was done with the game. Perhaps the tutorial missions were lame and hard to control was because they were more interested in teaching us instead of making it fun. Perhaps the game play improves once you get into the game and the missions. I personally doubt it, from the reviews of others.

I also read a walkthrough for the game, talking about what missions are coming up. You go back in time to your young self and help your father against an attack that seeks to alter the time line. And then as your young self you return to your fleet in the present. So if you were the target 12ish year old boy then “Yeah! I could do it” should be going on inside your head. I personally would be twitching and suffering a minor stroke if I understood the walkthrough correctly.

So I never played the multiplayer, and I didn’t give the game more then an hour of my time, including watching the same eight minute cut scene twice to make sure it was as bad as I thought the first time. Under my value system that gives it one dollar. And even that it didn’t really earn.

As soon as this gets posted I will delete the game off my computer and never see it again. With any luck.
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